One of the joys of being an ordained minister is the ability to perform weddings. Certainly, it is not difficult to gain the credentials to perform the ceremony, but it takes a lifetime of mutual submission to understand the gravity and depth of commitment those recitals carry with them.
First, One must understand that marriage is an alliance, not a competition. Paul says it so well, “Be subject to one another in the fear of Christ.” Great marriages stand out because both husband and wife realize their primary job is to serve the other. When the couples lose themselves in serving each other, everybody’s needs are met, and the family faces life as one.
When wives let their husbands stand as the head of the house, they do not give up one bit of their authority. They allow their husband to face the crises of each day knowing that they will have their wife’s support. It is not a banner to be waved in arrogance; it is a shield to be raised in protection of the family.
Husbands realize that they are also subject to their wife’s leadership. She makes the house a home and their group a family. The endless sacrifice is often done without notice or gratitude and is the picture of true leadership. Husbands that grasp that listen to the wisdom and direction of their wives knowing that it is focused on the family and its success, never really focused upon themselves.
I was once asked by a resentful husband why he should stand by while his wife fussed about having her particular snack in the cupboard which no one was allowed to touch. It infuriated him and he saw it as the epitome of selfishness.
I chuckled, paused, and then asked him, “Have you ever noticed that your wife is forever shopping, cleaning, and herding you and your children from one event to another?”
He said, “Yes, she never lets up.”
I then asked, “When she decides to stop and sit down for a minute, what do you and the kids do? “
He said, “We breathe a sigh of relief and take a break as well!”
I pressed on, “If she gets a snack or drink, what do you do?”
He paused, turned a bit red, and said, “We do the same.”
I asked, “And is there a snack that comes to mind?”
The husband softened, smiled, and realized that his beautiful, brilliant, and exceptional bride had literally exchanged her independence and identity for a thankless, endless series of sacrifices and difficult days filled with dirty clothes, dirty houses, and a mob of people that looked to her for every choice they made.
In exchange, she got one day a year to receive grocery store flowers, macaroni necklaces, and a dinner out that she did not have to plan or clean up. So, when she wanted to have one snack, drink, or moment she could call her own, she guarded it vehemently because she knew that the rest of the family would happily lay claim to it in a microsecond.
That is true leadership. That is why we must live subject to one another…more tomorrow.
God Bless You
21 [o]and be subject to one another in the [p]fear of Christ.
Marriage Like Christ and the Church
22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. 24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, 26 so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 that He might present to Himself the church [q]in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. 28 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; 29 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, 30 because we are members of His body. 31 For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. 32 This mystery is great, but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she [r]respects her husband.
Walking With God 